I sing better than you do!

Rare, and on the side.

When I say I like my meat still pink, I mean it. And I'm no middle-of-the-road kind of guy. I prefer my food served on the side.

Hotness Delusion Syndrome?

Nope. We middle-aged male hummingbirds actually ARE hot.

Don't you dare complain about ticks!

Nobody knows the troubles I've seen.